Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Life.

So why is it that at this point in our lives we are expected to make some of the biggest decisions in our lifetime?!
~ What to pursue in college
~ What to do with your life
~ Who to build a relationship with and when to marry them

I'm pretty sure I know what I'm supposed to do career wise, but why do I have to choose where to get my education? 

Why do I feel pressured to get a boyfriend? I know it's "normal" to have a "significant other" (if not once, several times) by the time you are in college, but where's mine? Why isn't it my turn? I just want to have someone that just wants to spend time with me and will call/text me just to let me know he's thinking of me, or even come to my house and watch a movie with my family. I'm ready to begin the building process of the relationship. I'm not ready to start moving furniture just yet.
I just watched August Rush again recently. That is one of my favorite movies! I never get tired of watching that one. The reason I'm bringing this up is because, towards the very end, when Louis sees Lyla again for the first time in 12 years, the look in his eyes is enough to make me cry. I dream of the day when a man will look at me with that much love in his eyes. It almost hurts watching this movie just because I've never seen that look directed at me. EVER. Yes, my family loves me, yes I have friends that care about me, but it's not the same thing. I want to get to know the man God has for me. 
I'm ready God! I've already started working on the blueprints, let's get the workers hired and the foundation laid so we can get to work on the structure!

I don't want to start feeling desperate to find a guy, but I can't help but feel like I'm missing out. I think I'm afraid to be alone. I want to be a wife and mother almost more than anything else in the world, but I don't want to jump for the wrong guy.

I know God has a special guy somewhere for me. He has to be special, because to fall in love and want to spend the rest of his life with me is going to take someone pretty special!! :)

I'm ready God. Do what You will.

1 comment:

  1. Don't get discouraged Michelle! You are a funny, beautiful and smart person and you're going to find the one for you soon enough.

    I feel the same way sometimes. I mean, I've never even been asked out on a date. I think in times like these we really need to rely on our Christian friends, so I'm glad you posted this.

    I have trouble waiting sometimes, but I try to remember that it is worth the wait. We are never really alone, and sometimes I think God is waiting to bring a guy into my life until I realize that I am ok without one. When I figure out how to be happy on my own, and I have the relationship with God that I should have then maybe I will be ready for a relationship with a guy.

    I hope this comment doesn't sound like I'm preaching at you or anything, because I'm in the same place you are and I have no idea what I'm talking about.

    Love you,
    Lindsey Jane

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